I turn 24 this year, and I’m spiralling and stuck in a constant state of existential dread thinking about it

I still feel so young but, like…not in a good way. I’m too old for everything now. I even feel too old for the mental illnesses and disabilities that I have. I dress too young, I act too young, and everything that I enjoy is immature and childish. I’m still so lost and scared, and I’m even less independent than I was before due to my mental and physical states and capabilities just plummeting over the past couple of years. I didn’t think I’d make it this far. I hate this.