I'm ashamed to think like this. (DID)

This is my first time posting here and I'm not used to using Reddit. But I feel like I needed some support in this regard.

I'm embarrassed to seek help. In my head, I'm just faking this to get attention(?? I would never do that) but there's no point in me faking it.

I started noticing the little symptoms as I discovered DID online. I think the thing I remember most that affected me was one night when my father swears I woke him up, afraid of sleeping alone, even though I don't remember that. I'm afraid I'm losing my mind, or deep down I'm just paranoid and I'm just crazy. Did you guys feel that?

I don't remember my childhood and so I feel like I have no right to think I have DID. If I don't remember my childhood, how will I know if I had trauma? I'm afraid I'm just paranoid but more and more it seems like I can feel 'someone' here with me. When I'm thinking mentally, I end up using "we" as if there were more than one person. And it's something so automatic that I feel bad.