Scared as hell

I recently started dealing with intrusive thoughts after a whole year suffering a panic disorder.

I lately feel like I'm out of my body, like I can't think or react. I feel depersonalization and derealization.

I tie myself everyday to my bed because I'm scared of waking up losing my mind and killing my loved ones. I even told them to please watch over me and protector themselves because I have a deep feeling and fear of losing all control and going crazy.

So worried I want to get hospitalized or kms.